Random Thoughts Friday II (on a Saturday)

Political Cartoons

* "Do as I say, not as I do" Take 1 -- Bill Clinton talked about wanting to bridge political divides and sanctimoniously wondered aloud if he was the only person who liked both President Bush and Senator Kerry. Aside from the obvious fact that Clinton has been and remains a deeply partisan person, it seems odd to make such statements on the opening of your library, a library that contains an alcove dedicated to the "politics of persecution", which ostensibly is about how the Republicans attempted to de-legitimize President Clinton and his administration. Did he say bridge or plank?

* Reportedly 2 alcoves "Things I am ashamed of" and "Things I take responsibility for" were removed from the library after Clinton couldn't think of one thing to include in them.

* "Do as I say, not as I do" Take 2 -- James Carville (after smashing an egg on his face... no, he seriously did) on last Sunday's Meet the Press railed against Republicans for being the anti-gay party and at the same time when asked if President Bush had a mandate said, "The only politician in America I know with a mandate is Jim McGreevey (the gay ex-Governor of NJ)."

* Speaking of mandates and in the department of "your candidate lost" Part I... before the election we heard that if Bush was elected that he would select conservative judges for the Supreme Court. Now we are being told by the same people (aka Kerry voters) that Bush somehow has an obligation not to select conservative judges. So wait, why did I vote in November?

* "Your candidate lost" Part II... The Senate should stick with tradition and name Arlen Specter to the chair of the Judiciary Committee. Pat Toomey lost the PA Republican primary and not because PA is filled with moderate Republicans but because a number of pro-life, conservative Christian Republicans voted and/or supported him (e.g. Sen. Santorum and me). If Specter is not selected, it will sadly confirm that the Republican Party has become like the Democratic Party and now has an abortion litmus test for key party positions.

* Why doesn't Lex Luthor wear a necklace made of kryptonite?

* Why doesn't Superman just have a suit and mask made entirely out of lead?

* I think you would agree that in a contest between a superhero and a super villain, the superhero would be favored by new fewer than 10 points, so how in the heck is there a superhero named "Underdog"?

* I suspect that Michael Powell and the FCC were behind Cartoon Network's decision to kill their behind-the-scenes look at the Tennessee Tuxedo cartoon, which had tentatively been titled "Making (Phineas J.) Whoopie".

A Lawyer in My Foyer

In honor of Dr. Seuss

So how could I make this site worse?
Why I could tell you my day in verse.

Yesterday I woke up and thought,
"A 2-day CLE, I've got.
Happy, I'm not.
200 lawyers and me,
paying a handsome fee
for 16 hours devoid of glee.
Oh, how awful this will be."

And so I drove downtown
wearing a beautiful frown
to meet counselors of renown
who graduated from Brown
while I hoped to drown.

And I'm sure you know that lawyers are contentious
But did you know that they are equally pretentious?

And while most are greedy,
preying on the sick and needy
the worst of the lot are also seedy.

And there they were...
A room full of the who's who
And all they could do
Was talk about whom to sue.

Bore me they did
Behind a newspaper I hid
as toward sleep I slid

So 2 days have now passed
And I assure you not too fast
Forever they did seem to last...

Those 2 days...
My CLE haze
and glossed-over gaze...

And so I wonder,
my thoughts torn asunder
by cell phones going off like thunder,
was this a blunder?

Should I have explained it in prose?
Made it Christmasy with ho-ho-ho's?
Ahh... who the hell knows.

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and a note

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Symbolically Numb

Much too soon

Pink ribbons. Red ribbons. The ubiquitous yellow ribbons. Red, white, and blue ribbons.

Be aware of breast cancer and AIDS, support our troops, God Bless the U.S.A., they shout to us from lapels, billboards, and bumpers.

Of course, I am at first left wondering, who isn't aware of breast cancer or AIDS? Who doesn't support our troops? And with the exception of certain atheistic , secular humanist extremists, who doesn't wish for God's blessings for our country?

As I think about it more deeply, however, I move from puzzlement to amusment and annoyance to rabid indifference.

I'm curious how many people who sport the omnipresent "Support Our Troops" stickers have actually donated any of their time, money, or possessions to do just that. Or whether their contribution to supporting our troops was and is to purchase a gaudy sticker that they can affix to their cars and S.U.V.s and proudly display what caring human beings they are without really having to care or do anything of consequence.

Similarly, why did so many people decorate their vehicles with flags after 9/11? The common response I hear is "a show of patriotism".

A show of patriotism?

Joining our military to fight against the terrorists, donating blood for our soldiers, risking your life to report on the war in Afghanistan or Iraq, and even arguing for restraint and against waging war are examples of patriotism.

Driving to Home Deport and buying a $20 flag for your Ford Explorer is the beginning of a story entitled, "How I spent my Saturday afternoon".

I just think it's easier for us (me... especially me... included) to do the symbolic act rather than something real, something meaningful, and somehow we have convinced ourselves that symbolic action is as important as true effort.

In my case, I just don't feel connected to these causes. I thankfully do not know anyone with breast cancer or AIDS, so people suffering from these diseases are simply a news story to me.

Like everyone else, I was tremendously moved and distraught over the sights and sounds of that fateful day in September of 2001. Men and women jumping to their deaths. Firemen rushing into towers of flames without regard to their own safety. But I didn't know anyone who lost their lives on Flight 93, or at the Pentagon, or in the twin towers of the World Trade Center, so over time (as much as I would like to say that it hasn't) I think even my feelings from that day have disappeared, replaced by thoughts of how I should feel.

And that is not to say that I do not have compassion and anger, but it seems somehow artificial to me.

What is real to me is a father's loss of his 5 year old boy.

It was a week ago that I heard about Chuck Loshnowsky's son, Collin. I have had the pleasure of knowing Chuck for several years. He owns a team in a fantasy football league in which I have participated for ten years. Chuck bares a striking resemblance to Jay Fielder and is simply just a good and decent guy (qualities which make him unique in our league).

A week ago today my friend, Brent, (our commissioner) sent around a note to several of us informing us that Chuck's son had been in a horrible accident. Collin, 5, had been playing with his brother (7) and some friends in front of Chuck's house, when they all decided to go skateboarding. Not having a helmet, Collin ran across the street to get one when he was struck and killed by a passing automobile.

Ever since that e-mail, not a day has gone by that I haven't thought about Collin, Chuck, Chuck's wife, Nicole, their other son, as well as the 77-year old man driving the car. Not a day has gone by that I haven't prayed for them all.

This is real to me and no sticker or ribbon in the world is necessary to make me remember, to make me feel what I feel today.

So while our soldiers battle bravely on in Afghanistan and Iraq and while men and women lie in hospital beds suffering through their final days, their bodies ravaged by cancer or AIDS, I think about driving more slowly now, looking this way and that, and of a 5 year old boy whose time has come much too soon.